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You probably wouldn't see this pickup stopping for
"Authentic Vermont Barbecue"
Any man who eats bbq eats like a king.
Growing up in Texas, I naturally assumed that cooking slabs of meat slowly
over a wood fire was uniquely Texan. Now I know it's not even
uniquely American, much less a Texas phenomenon. Still, we do it
best in Texas. Take a bbq tour from Dallas to Houston to San Antonio
to Austin through
Elgin,
Luling, Lockhart,
Llano, Stevenville,
Taylor and any bbq connoisseur in America would at some point aver
they've sampled the
best meat they've ever had. I've stopped in a few places in
Missouri and the Carolinas and sampled the local flavor. Arthur
Bryant's isn't bad, but it ain't Texas bbq. If I were stuck thousands of
miles from real Texas bbq I'd let loose with a Howard Dean scream of my
own. Good thing the King is an authentic Texan well versed in the fine art
of Texas bbq. If Texas bbq isn't the best, then
why are there so many imitators out there claiming
to be "Authentic Texas Bar-B-Que". You can't blame
them for wanting to recreate the flavor we've perfected here in the Lone
Star State. Hell, we Texans are generous people; we don't mind if
you cash in on our world-renowned bbq goodwill. Just don't sully our
reputation by serving an inferior product. Everyone has a bbq disaster
along the way. Slathering flavorless pork in Kraft Barbecue Sauce and call
it Texas Barbeque is disastrous and slanderous. Good bbq doesn't even need
sauce; in fact, you might insult the cook by asking for it..
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Charcoal is alright, for a rookie...or a chick |
What makes authentic Texas
bbq? An authentic
Texan. Lots of folks think brisket when they think Texas bbq. Maybe.
Southeast Texas is famous for pork ribs. Cooper's specialty is a 2"
thick bone-in pork loin chop. Kruez's signature is beef shoulder clod
cooked at 500º. Cabrito in South Texas. And Greenberg turkeys are
legendary. We do like our brisket, but it's not the only meat in the
pit. More often than not it's a couple of pork butts over oak or pecan in
my pit.
Texas bbq means burning real wood - lots of
wood. I've burned a quarter cord of wood to cook two briskets when
the size of the pit dictated a feeder fire to keep the temperature
low. Besides, nothing beats standing around an open fire. Once
again, different flavors in different parts of the state. Oak, pecan, and
hickory are all popular in East and Central Texas. Mesquite reigns supreme
(and grows like a weed) in the South Texas Brush country and West.
There are as many different kinds of bbq pits in Texas as there are
registered Democrats - hundreds if not thousands. Open brick pits,
enclosed brick pits, steel pits made from oil field pipe, even 55 gallon drums
cut in half known as Texas hibachis. If
it will hold a fire and support a grill full of meat, chances are some Texan has
cooked bbq in it. In college it was, "Dude, we could make a cool bong
out of that". Now it's, "Dude, put a firebox down there, slap in
reverse flow baffles and that would be an awesome cooker!" The toys
are more expensive, but I still reek of smoke every weekend until I stuff myself
and collapse in a grinning, greasy heap. |
So don't be fooled by the stuffed armadillo with sunglasses on the wall and
the ancho chile bbq sauce. If you want real Texas bbq you've got to find a
Texan.
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The Texas BBQ King grew up and lives in Dallas, TX. The Queen Mother is
from Wimberley, TX.
Grannie was born in Wimberley, too; grandfather was from Seguin.
BBQ is a weekly occurrence in my backyard; bbq consumes most of my waking
thoughts away from the office. It borders on obsession. That's what
makes Texas BBQ the best in the world. It's a lot easier to grill up a
bunch of burgers and brats. Cooking a sorry hunk of meat like a brisket
takes time and timing. The reward is a beautiful, tender, moist, and
flavorful slice of meat you'd be proud to serve to a king and even happier to eat
yourself.
Everyone who enjoys bbq owes it to themselves to take an extended bbq
vacation in the great state of Texas. You will find it takes a place as
big as Texas to showcase the incredible diversity of bbq styles and tastes as
you drive along Texas' 79,535
miles of highways. come during dove season and make it a
two-for. Texas has the best dove hunting, the best quail hunting, and best
deer hunting in the United States. World class fishing on the Gulf Coast
for speckled trout and red drum, world class fishing for largemouth bass at Lake
Fork. As if you need an excuse other than the chance to sample Texas bbq
and Texas hospitality. As an added bonus Texas has the best Mexican food
in the US to boot. You'll think it'd take a whole country to hold
everything Texas has to offer. And you'd be right. Texas was it's
own country. But we're such generous people we decided to share with the
rest of America and graciously accept the invitation to become a part of the
United States.
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Barely a whisper of smoke rising from the smokestack
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Be sure to visit the links page as a
starting point before any Texas bbq adventure. This is but one of many
sites on the Internet devote to the art and enjoyment of bbq, although this site
will have a decided slant towards Texas bbq. I'd love to hear and share
any stories, advice, or recipes anyone has to offer - even if they are from vast
bbq wastelands like New York or California.
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